Your Appearance Is Sending Unconscious Signals

It’s a well-known fact that we’re constantly sending signals to people.  Body language, gestures and phrases all come into play.  What we may not realize, though, is how our appearance plays a part in sending signals, too.  From clothing to hair and make-up, we’re telling the world where we’re at emotionally.  Knowing what you’re showing can help you understand why you’re getting the reactions you are, and how to modify yourself to being irresistible.

Starting with hair: the length of your hair can reflect your personality.  The shorter and more stylish it is, the more it tells others you’re high-maintenance, high-strung and meticulous.  It can also be a signal of insecurity because of the constant upkeep.  The most girlfriend-friendly hairstyles are mid-length, from chin to shoulders.  You take care of yourself, but don’t overdo it.  Long hair can be two different things:  either you’re attempting to recapture or play on youthfulness (which can be a sign of desperation if you’re an older woman) or that you simply don’t care.

Hair color is another readable factor.  Many women color their hair, and the choices in coloring speak volumes.  Black hair is the intentional rebel.  Brown hair is (again) the most friendly, because it’s the most common.  With warm highlights, it shows openness.  Red hair is the rarest, and will soon die out altogether.  A woman who colors her hair red is ready for a relationship and looking for attention.  Bottle blonds can come off as icy or unapproachable, and because the bleach does so much damage the ends get brittle.  Not keeping it trimmed makes a stereotypical cheapness.

The clothing we wear is also a reflection, not just in the style but in the color choices.  Here are the most common:

• Red. Again, signaling that you’re ready for a relationship or looking for some excitement. It’s the most eye-catching color, and that’s what it’s worn for.
• Black. Either a protection mechanism or a contrast to highlight the other features (i.e. figure and face).
• Brown. While it may be natural, it’s also a natural repellent since it brings to mind dinge and dirt.
• Yellow. Happiness, sunniness and joy in general, it can also scare people away from you if it’s too bright.  Imagine someone cheerful waking you up at 5am on a Sunday.
• White. Spotlessness tells of a clean freak, someone who would insist on coasters at the dinner table.  It can also be a sign of purity or untouchable-ness.
• Purple. A free spirit wears purple, and doesn’t care who likes it or not.  Especially vivid purples.  Independent and feisty.

• Blue. It can be complementary (for example, to match or bring out blue eyes) or it can seem commonplace or general.  Blue is the most common color worn by both men and women, and it blends in.
• Monotone outfits. Wearing all of one color is the same as erecting a wall between you and the world.
• Clashing outfits. A reflection of a lack of taste or thought, or it could be a cry for attention.

Make-up is an obvious way to tell a lot about someone.  Pan-cake make-up has connections to insecurities and cheapness.  Au naturelle is a coin-toss between natural beauty and confidence or laziness.  The in-betweens are saying they take care of themselves but don’t obsess.

It might be good to know the next time you’re getting ready for a hot date exactly what unspoken subtleties you’re telling him, and vice-versa.

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